Control

The more I try to control my thoughts, I feel myself become more emotionless and empty. I cant even began what this feels like right now. I try and then I hear nothing inside head and it’s just quiet. Silent. Echoing inside. I can’t even really hear my own anymore.

It’s driving me more crazy then having the racing thoughts and the voices. I don’t know what to do anymore. I’m going crazy and I don’t know

I don’t know. I just don’t know. I feel like I need a razor and I need to cut because I hate being like this. I feel like I’m locked inside my own head. And I’m screaming and I’m trying for someone to see the real me. Inside of me. I’m so scared what I am capable of what I can do to myself. And to others that might try to stop or get in my way.

But I’m alright.

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